the waiting...
We all love the Scripture in Isaiah 40:31 Yet those who wait for the LORD
Will gain new strength;
They will mount up with wings like eagles,
They will run and not get tired,
They will walk and not become weary.
Look at the literal translation of the word "Wait"...
"A straining of the mind in a certain direction with an expectant attitude...a forward look with assurance."
Waiting is not passive AT ALL.
It is very active!
While you wait for God's PERFECT timing in your music ministry, and you feel weary because you see others achieving what you believe He has called you to do, and you need new strength, Scripture tells you what to do: wait.
Don't wait like you may have thought about previously waiting--sitting around doing nothing. (Can't see YOU sitting around doing nothing, but this is how most people envision waiting!)
Wait like Scripture tells you to wait. Strain your mind toward God with AN EXPECTANT
ATTITUDE, and looking forward with assurance!
This is the BEST description I’ve heard in a while of how to wait on God’s direction!!! Sometimes we just need to really look at the meaning of the word He wrote to really grasp the rubber-meets-the-road application of it in our lives!!! Many of us are also aware that while we wait the enemy will come at us with all sorts of craziness and ways to pull us off course: sickness, fatigue, time-zapping situations, energy-zapping people (no joke, right?!), and even our own emotions will work against us!!! The key to overcoming this part in the waiting is the “straining our mind” part! The devil wants us to be straining our mind for sure on things that will keep us off-balance and out of focus on what God’s designs and plans are for our lives! However, if we can purpose in our hearts, and thus in our minds, to NOT be affected by the devil’s schemes; if we can recognize such schemes for what they are—a distraction, then we can remain focused on putting our mind on God and having an expectant attitude!!! God WANTS to give us the desires of our hearts, especially when those desires are HIS desires and not just selfishness!!! So, therefore, I HAVE to believe that God has my best interest and those of my family at heart during this waiting. And I have to TRUST not in my feelings but in my faith in Him! Jesus never said it would be easy but he’s always promised that we’d have his presence along the way—I’m never alone in Christ!!! So, any of you out there in the waiting land? Any of you have dreams that have yet to be tested? Hold on cuz this is the preparation to what lies ahead!! Take the opportunity to ask yourself and ask God, “am I ready for what you have for me?” He’ll let you know exactly what you’re to do!!! I always like to ask God to not let me miss it; “in my busy-ness and crazy schedule, let me not get so crazed that I miss what you’re saying to me, Lord!!” What about you? Do you need encouragement today? I’m happy to pray with you if you do!!! Let’s get active in the waiting game together!!!!
my question...
ok here goes...
The adventure part has always been part of my life since childhood. Ever since I can remember I yearned to be part of something big, to play a role that was needed…to be the warrior that saved the day. I also see that in my children…my girls want to be warrior princesses!!! The book encourages us to look at the things we like and dislike to learn more about what God has designed us to be. I watched The Count of Monte Cristo and loved it again. Partly because the changes that Edmond goes through to be better at everything resonate with me…whenever I watch a film in which the hero goes through major changes to become the man or woman he/she needs to be to save the day, I just beam! I feel like the last few years, God’s been grooming me like that. Adversity brings a dependence on Him and I learn certain skills that I never would have otherwise! This summer for example, I learned much about homebuilding and tools that I likely wouldn’t have picked up if not for necessity! Today, the girls and I watched Disney’s Pocahontas. What a woman she was in this portrayal! Even if she never really loved John Smith that way in reality, she still put herself between him and certain death! And in this version she’s vibrant, courageous, and strong! I want to be like that…to search out what’s “just around the river bend for me!” I’m so tired of being afraid of life, of fear itself! I fear for myself, for my husband, for my children. I want them to be fearless and strong, and yet I don’t know how to model that. I want so badly to run out and show them what it means to love openly without fear! I have no clue how to do that. I don’t want to just be safe in my little made up world. I don’t want to take risks that put myself or my family in unnecessary danger—I’m not stupid, but I do want to be braver with my hand and my heart! While there are definite times that I want to be rescued (mostly from the demands and stress of life), I also want to be the rescuer! I want to lead the charge having mastered the sword and my mount to ride in and conquer whatever evil is rampaging that day. I want to be more disciplined so that I can attack with strength and speed, not just defend myself from some unseen foe.
The part that I was struggling with is this idea of beauty to unveil. I’ve been told I’m beautiful, attractive, pretty, or cute. That has come to mean not a whole lot at all. I’ve been told that my voice is beautiful. But again, it doesn’t mean much. I’ve learned that unless I was using whatever outward beauty I have to get what I want, it just had no place in my life. However, I’m thinking now that I was wrong. I don’t want to be just another pretty face. I want to be stunning! Not for the way I look, but for the way I AM! I want to live my life in a way that makes others hold their breath and breathe easily around me at the same time. I want to be a servant that makes room for other women, men, and children to open up. I want to be a safe place for my family and friends. I want to be one who can be trusted, to encourage others to follow their dreams and talents, to love unconditionally. I want to walk with my friends through adversity, to uplift them, to cry when they cry and celebrate with them. I want to invest in my children part of myself, my battles, my joys that I might leave a legacy. I want to be remembered as one who loved fully and completely, fought for the right things, and encouraged others to live and love deeply!
Wow! Had no idea how much I wanted those things til now. As I write this I’m in tears over the prospect that I might or might not reach those goals. It’s a new life mission I guess. I know that I cannot do these things apart from God, nor does He want me to. I need to explore this further and begin to wrap my mind around how I can go about living this way. I think the stress of life has put me in a place where I’ve barely been able to focus on the moment. I need to have a better vision in spite of the stress, get my rest when I can, and be ready in any circumstance to not only do what it takes to keep moving forward but to move forward with a life full of color and strength!
So, let this be my war cry:
“Never let it be said that I was ever dull, for life is never boring! It is hard and tries to crush us if we let it! But I will not be harsh or crushed by life’s weight because I do not strive in myself! I choose to lean on the strength of my God, my rock and my salvation from whence my help comes! And I will be courageous on this adventure! I will be one who will be pursued and romanced because I am strong and beautiful, even in my weakness! I choose to love boldly and give high grace to all! I will speak life and not death! I will do justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with my God!”
LIVE THE DREAM 2009
I want to share with you all about Healing Place Church’s 3rd annual women’s conference, Live the Dream 2009! HPC’s known for really rolling out the red carpet for some fantastic speakers! We have Christine Caine and Bobbie Houston from Hillsong Church in Australia; Charlotte Gambil from Abundant Life Church in Bradford, England; and our special musical guest is 4-time Dove Award winner for Female Vocalist of the Year, Natalie Grant! Although I’m not performing this year, I feel so honored to be serving the ladies at my home church this weekend! I have a huge burden for those ladies who’ll be attending this year either in person or online! Yes, I said online! They will be streaming a live webcast at http://livethedream.healingplacechurch.org how cool is that?!! God’s really placed these ladies and the men in their lives on my heart! I feel the need to be there, to serve, to pray, to love on those, not only who need a first encounter with Jesus, but especially for those who already have a relationship with Him! I know firsthand what it’s like to come to know Jesus, and yet still have the baggage of my past hanging around my feet! It didn’t all just magically disappear when I met Christ, but with His help over time it DID disappear! Now as things pop up that remind me of that old stuff, I’m able to cast it off and make more appropriate choices instead of knee-jerk reactions. Oh I’m far from perfect and I still get it wrong; say the wrong words, do the dumb things! But, Jesus knows my heart and he gives me grace! Next time, I’ll do better because He’s with me! I know there are ladies like me who love Jesus and want to make those good choices! But maybe there are some who don’t know how. Maybe there’s some baggage leftover from a past full of addiction or abuse that might not have even been their own, but someone elses! It’s ok, Jesus can heal it and give us HOPE!!! That’s the theme of this year’s Live the Dream—HOPE! I’m so very excited to be a part of this event and to use my voice as an artist, mother, sister, Christian, servant to spread the word! Jesus is HOPE! And He can heal anything you’ve ever dealt with in your life! Check out what’s going on this weekend! Session 1 starts tonight at 7pm CDT and on through Saturday! Hope yall will be as blessed as I will! I already know that Jesus is here and ANYTHING can happen!!!! Blessings~ang
the latest....
Wow! My last blog was two days before my husband’s surgery and I thought things were tough up to that point! Boy, was I in for it! The next day we went to a regularly scheduled doctor’s appointment with an infectious disease doctor and Chuck was checked into the hospital by day’s end to await surgery the next morning at 8am sharp! At the time we were in the middle of remodeling our home and I had begun to take on the brunt of the work because Chuck had gotten so sick. He had incision and drain of infections in BOTH big toes due to complications from diabetes. So, he was in the hospital from Tuesday until Friday. After that he came home with IV antibiotics for 8 weeks and was under orders to stay off his feet—a very frustrating thing to do! Thankfully, God was there and provided for us through our local church which provided meals and even some babysitters so I could continue to work on the house! For the first two weeks, I added nurse to my list of daily duties as I was the one who would mix and set up the antibiotics for him to receive through his picc line at home until we figured out how to put on an extension for him to take care of it himself! This came at just the right time because not only had my son started Kindergarten the week after Chuck’s surgery, but my oldest daughter had to have an immediate tonsillectomy because she’d developed sleep apnea! So we went from one hospital to another! But again, God blessed us! Charli’s tonsillectomy not only went smoothly, but she recovered quickly and got immediate relief from her sleep apnea! She was a much more healthy, happy child following the surgery—an inconvenient but good decision! Now that two of my four charges were on the mend, Brennen was adjusting well to school and Charli was also successfully enrolled in dance class, I turned my attention more fully to the house! I became intimately acquainted with the likes of my sander, my 3 different types of saws, a nail gun, even special ordered an un-heard of scraper attachment for my reciprocating saw! I talked lumber! I measured, cut, hung, and floated sheetrock! I textured walls in the bathroom! I managed the demolition processes and back up to the re-grouting processes! Now, before you go thinking I’m a total superwoman…well I’ll let you entertain that for a moment (ha!)…I did get some help! I had a multitude of advice and some hands-on help from my father and friend who are both contractors, a friend in the lumber business, an uncle and another friend who are carpenters as well as some general labor help from some folks at church and a wonderful, master finisher named Mr. Hull! Finally, after many hours of long hard work and a pair of pants covered in caulk, paint, blood, and sweat, the house was finished on September 27th, at 730 pm! At that point I proceeded directly into the clean up and packing process and the movers came on Saturday, October 3rd! We’ve now been here in our lovely new home for a little more than a week! Chuck is free from IV’s but still on oral antibiotics and is still awaiting final x-rays and release from his doctors. Everyone is adjusting and I’m finally able to nap again despite many unpacked boxes! Yay!
Yes, I wanted to catch you all up in what’s been going on in our lives, but I also wanted to share more about what I learned during this very empowering phase of my life! I’ve had folks say to me at one time or another ,“how do you do it all?,” “I’d have been on the floor in the fetal position by the 3rd day of this stress!” and “you’ve had more than your hands full!” All of this may be true, but for the grace of God! If there was any doubt that Jesus is real (and there wasn’t, by the way), there certainly wasn’t now! There is absolutely NO WAY I could have done any of what I’ve done without Him! I’m not talking about a mere feeling that God is watching over me, I’m talking a down, in-the-trenches kind of experience. You see there was no one able to take care of me during this time and I was too busy taking care of everyone and everything else! I had NO CHOICE but to rely on an unseen God and to trust in the scriptures that I’d memorized! This brought me to a dependence that wasn’t just day to day or week to week, but literally moment to moment! I remember times when I was so tired from working in the heat of the day (the air conditioner was out) that my vision was blurred and my stomach ached from hunger but I knew if I stopped working for any reason before my allotted time, I would never finish! I had to keep plugging at it or I would have given up and we would never have gotten it finished—it was THAT overwhelming! There was so much work to be done and I was the only one who could do some of it or oversee it’s being done! I had to force myself to keep putting one foot in front of the other! There was one day that I was working on peeling up old, moldy, 40 year old tile off the floor and I was angry at the situation! I was struggling with my own emotions and hearing a voice in my head egging it on saying “you don’t need to be doing this! Why are you in this situation? This means no one loves you! Look at all you do and it doesn’t matter! No one’s gonna take care of you but you, so you just need to get up and walk away from all this! Let them deal with themselves!” Can you believe that??!!! I was fuming not only about the situation but that now I was being attacked with these thoughts!!!! So I fought back! Every time one of those thoughts came to my mind, I first tried ignoring it. Then when it got harder, I spoke back to it with scriptures that I could remember. When that only made it harder, I prayed! When that didn’t ease it up, I started yelling about what I knew to be true—this is what made the difference! I don’t believe it was the volume but rather WHAT I was saying! I would say things out loud about what I believed about the character of Jesus. Things like “I AM pursued and loved and cared for by the King of the universe! Jesus loved me with a love so deep that it moved Him out of heaven and onto a cross and even if I’d been the only person on earth at the time, he’d still have done it! Just for me!!!” The reason I believe this worked was not because I said it, but as I did I made a choice to believe it with all my heart! I CHOSE not to be angry! I CHOSE to believe that Jesus is and can do all that says he is and can do! I CHOSE! In those moments, I’d get a peace that might last about 60 seconds, but that peace would give me strength for the next 3 minute attack and then I’d get another minute’s reprieve. After a few of those, I could string together an hour of peace, then a day, then a week! There were times in the hardest moments when I’d have to come home and have brain power and physical strength to cook meals, bathe, and play with my children! I was absolutely wiped out, but I would often have periods of giddiness that I knew could only come from being sustained supernaturally! Unbelievable! I’d actually laugh out loud with excitement for NO reason! If I didn’t know any better I’d say I had cracked! But I did know better, because I’d been in the trenches and continued in them for several months! Denying myself sleep or a meal here and there was much easier than the exercise of calling up the TRUTH and believing it—trusting in it totally! But ultimately, what sustained me wasn’t sleep or food, but Jesus! Pure and simple!
I want you to know that no matter what you’re going through—no matter how stressful, how crazy, how busy, how painful, how hopeless it seems—Jesus is REAL and he loves you! He’s waiting for you to let go of those things and trust him with all you’ve got! But the catch is you have to choose! Choose life, not death! Choose to not be angry! Fight the thoughts with the TRUTH, acknowledge the facts, of course, but fight it with the truth! Who do really believe Jesus to be? Is he just up there on high like an angry kid with a magnifying glass? Or is he loving and faithful? Here’s a thought, if you think he’s the first option, do you think there might be ways that you’ve chosen to hold on to anger in your situation instead of forgiveness? We often reflect our view of our parents onto God. If you had a difficult relationship with yours, then it would be easy to assume that God is judgmental and cruel or negative toward you. But I challenge you, regardless of your view of God, to really look into His word and not just read for what you’re supposed to DO, but rather read and focus on WHO HE IS! I promise you’ll discover a whole new side to God, the Father, Jesus, the Son, and the Holy Spirit! If you have ANY excuse not to read it—your translation is too difficult to understand, you don’t know where to start, or you don’t have one—email me at angie@angieewing.com or message me on facebook or myspace! We’ll help you get started! Be encouraged in this: you are LOVED! If Jesus can do it for me, he can do it for anyone! I’m praying for you! Blessings~ang
sorry been so long...
New blog 7/27/09
It’s been so long since I wrote anything. Mostly this is due to the fact that I’m a
normally busy mom of three active children, but I was that before I lost touch!
For those of you who ever feel like you never have it all together and might be
a bit overwhelmed with life, know that you’re not alone! These days my husband
has gotten ill with diabetic ulcers on the bottom of both feet, one of which is
infected down to the bone! This week alone brings more probing by different
specialists and an MRI to determine the cause and exactly what procedures
should be done and when. In the
meantime, he’s to stay off his feet and rest. Which means? You got it! I’m
doing everything else! Oh yeah, we’re also in the process of a major remodel at
our house which has been prolonged due to this new development. We’ve been able to secure an extension on our
current lease to allow us the time to finish and for my hubby to heal some
before we move. Ultimately, we’ll be in
great shape after we get settled but in the meantime, I’ve had to learn some
new skills. I’ve become very familiar
with my drill, my hammer, and my reciprocating saw. I now know how to hang sheetrock, patch
holes, and texture walls. Soon I’ll have
mastered laying tile and laminate flooring and later, molding and base
boards! Most folks have been overwhelmed
when I simply mention all that we’ve been doing—our busy-ness is often
perplexing to others! But what I hope folks will understand is that while this
is taxing to me and to my husband (who by now is going absolutely stir crazy
sitting around all day!), I feel the presence of the Lord more fervently than
ever before! I hear His voice when my body is tired and aching at the end of
the long days. Just today I read Matthew
28:20 “…and be sure of this: I am with you always,
even to the end of the age." I was brought to tears at the reminder that
my Lord is with me! On those days when it’s definitely not easy, I’m never
alone! I feel His peace and an
underlying joy that sustains me through the hardest moments when my physical
body feels that I’m going to drop any second, but my child needs my attention
or my husband needs me to do “one more thing” before I can rest. I keep up my health as best I can because I know
I can’t afford to go down now. So I faithfully
take my vitamins and I’ve increased my exercise regimen to keep up the
pace. I have some good friends who hang
out with my children so I can go work on the house while others come help me
with the construction parts. And still
others in the wings who are constantly praying for my strength and my husband’s
healing! What would I do without them? What’s
all this for? Why are we going through all this? Why does it feel like “when it
rains, it pours?” Well, I can’t answer
that for you, but I know for me I can say that I’m learning more about myself
and my Savior during this crunch time.
He’s developing some grit in me that I knew would be coming. And more than that, he’s reminding me
steadily of my mission. I’m constantly
being asked to expand my capacity and do more, learn more, be more…work harder,
live stronger, have less fear! And all
this produces a greater desire to see men, women, and children be healed from
their past hurts and step fully into the lives that God intends for them to
live! While that doesn’t necessarily mean a life free of stress or hardship, it
DOES mean a life knowing that you can do ANYTHING through Christ who
strengthens you! I know that Jesus will
never waste my pain and others will be helped through my difficulties. I know that no matter what happens I am LOVED! I’ve learned to trust and lean on His
guidance for the simplest things. My children
are learning too during all this! They are learning how to really pray and put
others ahead of themselves. To hear
their small voices praying for me and their daddy is so sweet and
precious! Maybe right now you’re
struggling through something difficult and finding it hard to get by. If that’s you and you already have a
relationship with Jesus Christ then I encourage you to dig in and get to know
HIM...not for what He can do for you, but for who He IS! If you don’t know Jesus in this way and would
like to know more, feel free to write me at angie@angieewing.com. As always if you need prayer, we’re here for
you as well! Let us know! Til then, I pray you have many blessings….
ang
Are you sick and tired yet?
Are you sick and tired, yet?
I realize that I’m about to make some pretty strong statements in this blog today. I just feel led to post my position as a follower of Jesus Christ. I do not wish to impose my beliefs on anyone or to offend, however, I don’t apologize for my stance on the scriptures. I believe that Jesus requires us all to examine our hearts and make a decision on where we stand. I think it is only fitting that I do so at the close of one year and the beginning of the next.
I no longer subscribe to the term “Christian.” It has become watered-down and made into a religious misnomer that allows all kinds of warm and fuzzy feelings in church, but no real conviction in life. Call me uber conservative and a radically right-winged evangelist bible thumping hater if you must, but I prefer the term “follower of Christ.” You might wonder what exactly is the difference, but in this day and age, sadly, they have become very different animals (in my mind, at least!). The term “Christian” having been taken from the title of Christ (which means “Annointed One”) became the name of those who believed in the teachings of Jesus as the Messiah or anointed son of God. So, at one time they were one and the same, Christians were followers of Christ. However, today anyone who believes in God is a “Christian.” Anyone who can quote a few scriptures (however inaccurately) is a Christian. Anyone who thinks that Jesus may have been divine is a Christian. Anyone who goes to or has ever attended a church is a Christian. Anyone who votes republican is a Christian. My point is that even the Devil and his minions believe in God, can quote scripture (probably with more accuracy than some in a pew), show up in church from time to time, and might even vote republican. While some of these statements might indicate a religious notion, NONE of them actually indicate the inner change necessary to live a life as a “follower of Christ!”
Make no mistake, I’m not saying that a body shouldn’t do the above mentioned things, but that they alone are not enough to “inherit the kingdom of heaven.” (1 Cor 6:9-10). No amount of good work or good thoughts or good therapy will get you into heaven but one thing…a total, complete, absolute surrender of yourself to Jesus Christ as your personal savior. I use the word personal here because it indicates a relationship, not a religion, not some words you just say, not some thought or vibe you put out. Instead it requires a person’s wholly committed desire to not living and wallowing in their own self anymore! We have to reach the end of our sin, our lifestyles, our ideas about how to live. Why, you might ask? To answer that you need to know that I believe that heaven is not the only goal or reason to be saved! The notion that we can live in a place where there is no sickness and no tears, where we can spend eternity praising our Creator and hugging our loved ones is definitely a reason to consider Christ. But the wonderful thing is that God wants us to have freedom here on earth and power to live out loud! Because of my commitment to Christ and my relationship with Him, I don’t have to worry about bills or illness or death—not because they don’t exist for me, they do! All of us have hardships and ills we’ve suffered in this life, but I don’t have to spend my time consumed with stress, eaten up with ulcers from anxiety or panic over how I’m gonna function tomorrow. Please don’t misunderstand me…I know what it means to not know where or when the next paycheck will come, to not know if the lump in my breast is cancerous or not, to be told we have to get that baby out of you NOW!!!! I know what it means to lose something so precious and promised. But all that while, I gave my hopes, my fears, my worries to Jesus and while they didn’t miraculously disappear, my anxiety sometimes did. While the circumstances weren’t always optimistic, I was able to be so because I trusted that I couldn’t see everything there was to see. I knew that Jesus could see farther down the road than I can, and he alone holds my future in his hands! What a weight that lifted off my shoulders when I began to understand that life is crappy and hard sometimes, but my God is bigger than any problem. That means I NEVER carry a burden alone. I NEVER face a situation without hope. I NEVER endure hardship without grace. I NEVER fail without forgiveness. This, my friends, is a freedom that I cannot obtain anywhere else! (Gal 5:1) Wow! Freedom here on earth AND eternity in the cool blue place walkin streets of gold? Those are some compelling reasons to consider Christ!
What about you? Are you comfortable with where you are? Are you living in mediocrity willing to accept the stuff the world is doling out? Or are you tired of what the world has to offer and want that freedom I was talking about? If you’re okay to sit where you are, then that’s fine. But if you’re not and you want out, a different life for yourself and your family, then all you have to do is pray this prayer with all your heart!
Dear Jesus, I’m no longer satisfied with where I am in life. I’m no longer willing to accept the status quo. I want to be able to live with a freedom that only you can provide. I admit that I’m a sinner and cannot change myself. I ask you, Jesus, to come into my life and change me from the inside out! Forgive me, Jesus for all that I’ve let get in the way of a real relationship with you! Thank you for all you’ve done for me, for dying a criminal’s death on that cross in my place. I love you, Lord and I give myself fully to your care.
AMEN! That’s it! If you prayed that prayer sincerely and want change, then you’ve just accepted the free gift of salvation from Jesus Christ and made yourself more than just a Christian, but a “follower of Christ!” The next step is to get involved in a local, life-giving church. If you need help finding a church in your area, shoot me an email. Please let me know how you are, especially if this is the first time you’ve prayed this way. Email me at angie@angieewing.com and tell me your story! Many blessings in this New Year!
Noah Moudy--Boy Wonder!
Blog 10/06/08 b
Noah Moudy
I know that many of you have seen my recent status updates about Noah and the Moudys. I want to tell you a little more about him. Noah is 4 and is the youngest of 6 children in the blended family of Mat and Christy Moudy (pronounced like cloudy). They live in a rural town in central Mississippi. A perfectly normal child, Noah went to the doctor for a swimmer’s ear infection earlier this year. After some scary symptoms showed up, Noah’s mom, Christy, didn’t take any chances but instead brought him to Batson Children’s Hospital in Jackson, MS. On June 26th, 2008, he was diagnosed with AML leukemia. As with most forms of cancer, chemo therapy is a common treatment and Noah is undergoing that now hopefully for the last time! Unfortunately, the closest thing to a cure is a bone marrow transplant or BMT. His will be tomorrow, Friday, October 10th, 2008. His older sister, six year old Jessica, will donate her bone marrow to Noah in the hope that he will be cancer free for the rest of his life! Now, you might ask why THIS child has become so important to me when so many others are dealing with similar life-threatening issues. It’s because I’ve actually spent time with this child and his parents, particularly his mother. At first, I was with them without being in their presence, and when we did finally meet in person, we hugged like we’d known each other for years! Christy’s sister in law works with my stepmother in Jackson, MS. When Hold On (to Love) was released, Jane, my stepmom, brought a copy of the song to work and passed it around. Eventually, the song made its way to Christy who found great comfort in the song and became my friend on myspace. After many talks online, she said she wanted someone to sing the song in her church and I said I’d be happy to do that for her. So, on September 28th, we travelled to the rural town of Leesburg, MS to sing Hold On in her little Baptist church where Christy and several of her family members were in attendance. It was a connection that I rarely get with an audience/congregation! Everyone there knew Noah, his family, and his situation. Everyone there had prayed for them at one time or another. And everyone there knew that I’d come to sing to Christy! There weren’t many dry eyes! It was difficult to sing and not cry that day! For the remainder of the service, I sat next to Christy and tried desperately to will some comfort over to her! The previous day we’d been to the hospital to see Noah, but he’d been asleep, so we went after church on Sunday while he was up. What a joyful child! A typical 4 year old, playing Mario on a Nintendo DS, he was silly and playful with me! He reminded me so much of my own four year old, just without hair! He didn’t seem sick, but I knew he was just that and my heart went out to his family! His sister, Jessica, was there too and she’s also a delight! She’s so happy to be doing this for her brother; happy to be the hero of the day! I can’t imagine what this family is going through even after seeing a sliver of their lives in the hospital that day. Since then, we’ve been praying for Noah, his family, his health, and the upcoming transplant several times a day. We know that afterwards, he’ll have to be in isolation at the hospital and at home for 100 days, as if the operation isn’t difficult enough!
I’m so grateful for having the opportunity to meet this family and this precious little boy! I’m so blessed that this song has touched them and allowed us to be brought together! I’m so humbled by their grace in the face of this trial! And I pray that Noah will find his purpose beyond having HAD leukemia and Jessica will find hers beyond being his donor! Hopefully, they will put this behind them and move on to better things together! In the meantime, we pray that God in His infinite power and might would speak to Noah’s bones as he did through Ezekial in the valley and make them LIVE! (Ez 37:1-14). I’m praying not only for Noah’s literal bones to be made whole, but also for the structure of his whole life to be preserved not merely encapsulated by this illness. He and his family will forever be touched and changed by this experience, but it doesn’t have to define them! I pray that regardless of the outcome, it never will! This family knows Jesus and serves Him actively through their local church. Jesus said that we would have trouble in this world, but that He has overcome this world! (John 16:33) Greater is Jesus, who lives in us, in Mat, in Christy than he who lives in the world (the devil, our flesh, and the world at large)! Though they are struggling through these tough times, the Moudys are living each day to the fullest, loving one another, serving one another, and giving of themselves to others there at the hospital. Noah spends time with Emily another patient undergoing the same illness and treatment that he’s going through. The families bolster each other with words of encouragement and, for Christy, passing on the song that connected us and gives her a sense of peace, Hold On (to Love). Thank you, Noah, for being so brave! Thank you, Jessica, for being his hero on Friday! Thank you, Christy, for letting me and my family into your life and for sharing the song with others that you feel might need it. Thank you to all the other Moudys that I met at Leesburg Baptist for your support of Noah and for making me feel so welcome. We’re praying for a miracle!
If you or someone you love is facing some kind of trial or illness and you want prayer or just to talk, send me an email at angie@angieewing.com. If you want to know more information about Noah Moudy and his situation, you can read about him at www.caringbridge.org/visit/noahmoudy. I encourage you to get involved with someone who is struggling right now. Walk with them and let them wrap themselves around your heart the way this family has done around mine! You won’t regret one single moment of having loved and been loved this way! Many blessings this week~ang
Renea!
Blog 10/6/08
Renea!
For those of us who’ve made a decision to follow Christ each day and submit to His will for our lives and not our own, we often have someone in our past who showed us the path; someone who guided us or showed us something about themselves and their own relationship with God that changed us. For many, that person is an elder, a family member, or a mentor. For me, that person was a peer and a friend. Her name is Renea and she showed me what an authentic Christian looked like at 11yrs old! She wasn’t afraid of death or of sharing her faith with others. She was the one who asked me in the middle of a discipleship weekend that my church was having if I’d ever accepted Christ. While I’d always prayed and talked openly with God and knew about him, felt his presence even, I’d never made a formal decision, giving my life to Him completely. She told me that all of these things were great, but that my relationship depended on my having accepted His gift to me and then making my desires and will subordinate to His will for my life. Of course, she used different language and spoke like any other 11 year old, but she was wise and spoke with such authority that I knew she was right! She wasn’t like many of the other girls I knew who talked others into following after worldly things and selfish desires. Renea spoke with passion about the Jesus she knew and talked about an intimate relationship with Him! I prayed with her the sinners prayer and afterward got baptized in my home church on the MS gulf coast. Later, we would go on many church functions together and we’d talk about how Jesus affected us. She was strong in her faith and never seemed to waiver while I, on the other hand, was a little too focused on what I wanted! I often struggled with giving myself fully to God. She watched me get a little crazy just being myself at a retreat (sugar high, no doubt!) and then pull away slowly throughout high school. We were always nice to each other, but eventually we ran in similar, but different circles…she was busy with the band, eventually becoming drum major, while I moved up in the choir and madrigals and quickly got more and more solo opportunities. But I believe that the gap was wider than I wanted to admit because I’d fallen further away than I really wanted to go and college made it worse. Eventually, though, God brought me back to Himself and to Renea. I found out several years ago that she and her high school sweetheart had married and moved to the same town as me, and we got together every now and then for a quick visit. I’ve since lost touch with her after we’ve each had children. Yesterday in church on my first weekend off from performing Hold On in a few weeks, my pastor preached about Nicodemus coming to Jesus and his story of salvation in John chapter 3. This is, of course, where the well-known scripture John 3:16 is from, but Dino was talking about what it means to be saved and how he had an authentic Christian in his life that made him think about where he was and wanted to go at 16 years old. I immediately thought of Renea and had the desire to blog and publicly thank her for being that for me! I know that Jesus saved me and has called me to this ministry, but He used Renea to first call my attention to Him! Thank you, Renea for being obedient to His call on your life and for loving me in my crazy moments when were kids (even on a sugar high). Thank you for showing a Nicodemus who Jesus really is! I’m sorry we’ve lost touch and if you want to catch up, please email me! I pray that God will bless you, your marriage, your children, and your ministry a hundred fold for all you’ve done for those like me! As for any of you, if you already know and serve Jesus Christ, take a moment to thank that person, if you’re able, who helped show you the way and bless them in their lives today. If you don’t yet know what it means to be one of the family of Christ, then I urge you to seek Him out today! If you have questions or need prayer or just want to talk about your life, I want to hear from you! Email me at angie@angieewing.com and let me know how you are! Many blessings to all of you this week~ang
Affected by the music...
I’m always amazed at how what I do affects other people. In my life, I’ve had my actions picked apart by those who might seek to tear me down in an effort to make themselves look and feel better. I think everyone has dealt with that at one time or another. I’m also pretty sure that most folks also have had moments when their actions have affected someone for the better…a helping hand lent at the right moment or a timely word given in a tough situation. I’ve had the benefit of having people tell me that they find my voice beautiful and sometimes they tell me that they feel uplifted by a performance. I know that I do my best in every circumstance and hope that the things I do on stage and off are meaningful to someone. However, I’ve never been so touched as I have been since Hold On (to Love) has been released! I’ve recently been blessed to have folks contact me through the website or the myspace page and let me know how the song has affected them. One lady told me that she and her husband have been separated due to some baggage they had each brought into their ten-month marriage. Turns out, they decided to seek individual as well as couples counseling, but were still struggling with their issues. This precious lady was feeling so defeated by her past and was seeking God’s answers for her life (yay!!!). It was during this time a few weeks ago that she heard Hold On on the radio, thanks to Scott Innes and WYNK. She wrote to me and told me of her issues and that she felt that God was blessing her with the song, showering her with His peace. In recent days, her husband has come home and they are working toward the renewal of their marriage together! WOW! Another lady from Lafayette also heard the song on the radio on her way home from work and had been praying, crying to God for help for her finances and other issues. She had asked the Lord to speak to her reminding her of His presence and when the song came on, she felt His peace immediately and began to see His blessings in her life. Again, WOW! I’ve gotten case after case like these in which folks are saying that they feel God blessing them through the song. These are the times when I have to say a) thank you, Lord, for allowing me to be your instrument and b) my job is done! All I ever wanted for this song was to let folks know that you aren’t alone, that God loves you, and whatever you’re going through, with His help you will get through it! Love conquers all! It’s amazing the number of folks who tell me “I’m singing it around the house!” one of whom is a friend who is an up and coming opera star at New York’s Metropolitan Opera! It’s such a blessing and so humbling to have this kind of attention, to have something that was part of my heart for so long reach out and touch people this way. To my friends, family, and fans: thank you for the opportunity to sing to you in your time of need or to just give you something fun to sing around the house. I’m humbled and honored to be counted a part of your lives through this song. Many blessings this week~ang